I'm just still surprised by that Pelicot case in France. How was he able to find dozens of men to do that, for years, without someone asking questions, tipping someone off, or just thinking, "Wait a minute...?"
Not just finding dozens of men: all of them were inside a frighteningly small geographical radius from them. Like, you'd think that this was about setting up some shit that required looking all over the country, potentially other countries, but it was all local. That's the most fucked up bit.
The thing is: as a woman, I didn't find it unexpected. At all.
What really surprised me with that case, was the men's reaction to it.
I expected the ones in denial ("she must have known", "it's impossible she never felt something was wrong", etc.), the ones dismissing ("yeah, it's just some bad apples, but what's really bad is those generalising about men because of it"), the ones trying to say it's not men just like them who are the problems ("these are not men, these are monsters", or the "it's immigrants once again" - nope, too bad for the far right, a majority were white French men). These are the usual reactions to the horrors women encounter, so no surprise here.
No, what was really surprising was the sheer amount of men finding it surprising. Like, are we even living in the same world??? Rapists are everywhere, and can be just about anyone, and there are more than just a few. Women have been saying it since decades at least.
It only showed me once more how little men listen to women, or if they did how little credit they give to what they say.
Exactly. I can go online and pull up a list of registered sex offenders in my area, knowing that those are only the ones who actually got caught and punished.
How could anyone be surprised is beyond me.
And yet, first responses to my message and below are "but me I'm such a good man that other men don't dare be sexist before me".
When I don't even talk about men reacting to other men's behaviour, only about men not listening and believing the numerous women who say it's anyone anywhere (or rather everywhere given the amount).
When it's not "but women never told me, how was I supposed to know?". Yeah sure. It's not like it's a secret whispered between girls.
Talk about tone deaf. You talk to them about listening to women and they answer "but such men don't talk to us like that".
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u/eur26 3d ago
I'm just still surprised by that Pelicot case in France. How was he able to find dozens of men to do that, for years, without someone asking questions, tipping someone off, or just thinking, "Wait a minute...?"