r/AskReddit • u/AuthorConfident9386 • 13h ago

Men, what’s one small, seemingly insignificant thing you’ve noticed that can be a telltale sign of the difference between a genuinely good man and a bad one?

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u/warindf 13h ago

How he treats those that he cannot benefit from.

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u/lrdwlmr 12h ago

Or those who are beneath him or outside his “tribe.” I first heard this as dating advice, but it’s much more broadly applicable than that: “someone who’s nice to you but rude to the waiter isn’t a nice person.”

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u/fcocyclone 11h ago

Broadly applicable but yeah especially applicable to dating advice since most people are trying to put their best foot forward and impress their dates\SOs. Some people never stop that effort, but its a glimpse into what kind of treatment could be ahead if and when they do.

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u/OkOrchid6016 11h ago edited 11h ago

There was this episode in Seinfeld where the main guy tries to "break up" with his life long friend who always calls him but is annoying, and he takes him somewhere to eat, and tries to break up with him like he's trying to separate from his girlfriend, and before he does this, the friend guy who won't let go of him is kinda rude to the waiter, but when he tries to end the friendship, he breaks down in tears, so the main guy feels terrible because he doesn't have anybody else, and takes it back and they continue to be friends.

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u/HistoryDoesUnfold 10h ago

You don't remember what "the main guy" in Seinfeld is called?

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u/ThaddyG 10h ago

Johnny Siegfried, duh

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u/aCynicalMind 11h ago

Good for you..JACK!

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u/TangerineTango69 6h ago

Remembering the scene in Sweet November.

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u/chat-lu 7h ago

I heard of a boss who was using this screen interviewees. Instead of doing the interview in his office, he was inviting applicants to lunch. And he would give 20 bucks to the waitress to drop water on the interviewee “by accident”. Those getting angry at her failed on the spot.

I don’t know if it’s true or not but I love it. Way cheaper than what you lose by hiring an asshole.

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u/m1a2c2kali 11h ago

This might be coming from a place of ignorance but are a lot of people unkind to wait staff still these days.

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u/lrdwlmr 41m ago

The short answer - in America, at least - is yes. A lot of people are rude to waitstaff at a lot of places. People can be rude, demanding, even hateful because they see the waitstaff as a safe target - someone at whom they can direct their broader frustration, aggression, anger, etc. without consequence. Where I’m from we have a saying: “shit rolls downhill.” People on one rung of a hierarchy take out their frustrations at those on the next rung down because they can’t do so with those on the next rung up.