r/mildlyinfuriating • • 16h ago

jkfl hrtmktp gzarrp! Apparently that’s not how you turn it on

5.2k Upvotes

179 comments sorted by

3.6k

u/maggiemayfish 15h ago

OP be like:

368

u/vitalviper 14h ago

Where is that from?

655

u/Bruichladdie 14h ago

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, one of their best episodes. The Gang Goes on Family Fight.

130

u/Yolo_swag-brah22 14h ago

What is this enticing bowl of white?

55

u/wund3k 13h ago

Aren't you like the cheese guy?

37

u/FridgeFucker17982 12h ago

I’ve never been to a cottage before

31

u/Aksi_Gu 11h ago

I imagine you've never had dragon before either, given it's not a food for the common people

62

u/HerrPiink 15h ago

This doesn't represent me though

17

u/Spotted_Tax 14h ago

Are you OP? Well, that's r /technicallythetruth

7

u/InTheStuff 14h ago

always one you haven't seen

3

u/Irish_Snoop_Dogg 9h ago

What's big bird doing on family fortunes

2.0k

u/SlideItIn100 16h ago edited 15h ago

How hard did you press the fake button to cause that kind of damage?

2.0k

u/AppropriateLie9140 15h ago

I assume he put his finger on it and pressed down, causing the thin and brittle plastic to easily break under little pressure

1.2k

u/SpecialChain7426 15h ago

Exactly!

176

u/Silver4ura 14h ago

More like Exactly that hard.

12

u/Grouchy_Ground_1916 12h ago

...then what did he do?

2

u/LuxuryBeast 10h ago

Took some frisky pictures of the result.

1

u/pablo_kickasso 3h ago

He fingered a girl. Once.

1

u/stranded_egg 1h ago

/looks at image again

...that poor girl

-14

u/[deleted] 15h ago

[deleted]

37

u/AmphibiousDad 14h ago

I love it when people try to tell someone who actually interacted with the thing in real life that they can tell through a picture on the internet that they know better

-14

u/SubaruSufferu 14h ago

If an amateur kneaded a bread, then a professional baker came in and gave advice online, would the professional baker know better than the amateur?

15

u/AmphibiousDad 14h ago

are these two examples completely different from each other? Yes they are

6

u/Flammzzrant 14h ago

If i pooped my pants would you know how to wipe myself better than I do?

-4

u/SubaruSufferu 13h ago

The original comment is a blanket statement which is a little flawed. Besides, sure, If I were a nurse, I could probably do it better.

4

u/Flammzzrant 13h ago

-6

u/SubaruSufferu 13h ago

You know I answered the question? If I were a nurse, sure.

39

u/AgelessJohnDenney 15h ago

It actually looks very thin and very brittle. With no support underneath it, pressing down on the middle wouldn't take much to crack it like that.

19

u/No_Zombie2021 PURPLE 14h ago

Especially if it has been heated from underneath on and off for years.

11

u/Eckx 14h ago

It's not just that it's thin and brittle, but this looks like a hotel room, so how many other people also have do this, causing the plastic to flex and weaken over time.

42

u/Garlic-Rough 13h ago

I imagine OP to have just kept applying pressure until the light turned on - only to be surprised that it shattered.

22

u/Content-Ad-9119 14h ago

Yeah because it looks like robust materials were used lol

1

u/5litergasbubble 12h ago

Just hard enough to break

0

u/BinaryHippie 12h ago

He forgot to put in the batteries/charge it

850

u/Jacob520Lep 14h ago

I have this lamp.

That's not a button to be pushed.

You gently tap the top to turn it on and off.

It's also usb rechargeable, and needs to be fully charged before it works.

Sorry you broke it.

279

u/panspal 13h ago

That's fucking dumb, charging your lamps.

36

u/ProfessionalPack7205 9h ago

Lol it's a portable one. Not a in house one that you plug in.

202

u/Killerpanda552 13h ago

It’s not that dumb. It’s just a portable light.

61

u/Jacob520Lep 11h ago

It's perfect for camping or any spot with no outlet handy.

8

u/GalcticPepsi 8h ago

If only this didn't look like a stationary hotel room

6

u/Jacob520Lep 8h ago

If only hotels rooms were ambulatory.

4

u/Bludypoo 6h ago

pretty bad for camping with that shape and easily breakable top...

51

u/[deleted] 13h ago edited 10h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

16

u/Fa1nted_for_real 12h ago

Besides, whats the difference between a normal corded lamp and a corded lamp that you can unplug and ise in a pinch...

1

u/fm01 10h ago

Well these ones have batteries in them so they're more environmentally unfriendly, so regular lamps are preferable. But another user made an interesting point - maybe the area regularly suffers from power outages, then it makes sense to have "independent" light sources.

-17

u/FordMaleEscort 13h ago

They have something for these scenarios: a lantern

30

u/fm01 13h ago

Well that's basically what these are - electrical lanterns.

-27

u/FordMaleEscort 13h ago

Right, except they're lamp shaped and being used in place of lamps

26

u/redhedstepkid 12h ago

A lantern is a portable lamp. Do you also go “charging a iphone is STUPID, you can just use a rotary phone!!” 

-6

u/FordMaleEscort 12h ago

When was the last time you used a lantern that was shaped like a table top lamp?

When was the last time you had two portable lanterns flanking your hotel bed?

3

u/SveaRikeHuskarl 11h ago

The lamp can easily be used for example when you go camping (or more likely glamping as you tend to really pack practically for camping) for some nice mellow light in the tent instead of a bright lantern/flash light.

As for the hotel, makes sense if it's in an area prone to blackouts/brownouts.

The touch button is still dumb though.

0

u/FordMaleEscort 10h ago

I feel like everyone here is being intentionally obtuse just to argue with me.

→ More replies (0)

1

u/Killerpanda552 10h ago

So really you just dont like the shape? Its the same as a lantern.

1

u/FordMaleEscort 10h ago

I am fine with the shape. It's not at all like a lantern.

→ More replies (0)

21

u/fm01 13h ago

I'm failing to see your point tbh...

-18

u/FordMaleEscort 13h ago

I'm agreeing with the guy who said charging lamps is stupid

2

u/MAJLobster 9h ago

do you think filling a lamp with benzene is better?

1

u/FordMaleEscort 9h ago

Sure why not

29

u/Fauked 12h ago

You never heard of a flashlight before

14

u/Altruistic-Place 12h ago

Only fleshlights!

-6

u/panspal 12h ago

Those take batteries

25

u/Killerpanda552 10h ago

Put in rechargeable batteries. Now it’s the same thing.

9

u/aguywithbrushes 11h ago

Plenty of them don’t these days

3

u/wivaca2 10h ago

I have this incredibly bright flashlight - daylight at night bright - that has USB C port and built-in rechargable batteries. I think if it used replaceable batteries it would last 2 minutes.

Standing on a table pointed at the ceiling, it's essentially a portable torch lamp. Hmm. Maybe that's why the Brits call flashlights torches.

-10

u/Sacharon123 12h ago

We have. However this is not a flashlight. The purpose of the batteries in a flashlight is so that it works in the woods or on the beach. This is a table lamp. It does not need to work in the woods or on the beach. There is no reason to waste precious electronics and batteries into a table lamp if there is a power outlet besides it. If there is no power outlet besides it, you either a) have planned badly or b) you do not need an electric light there.

11

u/TraditionalGap1 12h ago

... my precious...

But seriously, as someone who owns a lamp like this, it's great being able to move it about without ducking behind all the furniture to unplug it. It's dimmer than a typical table lamp, illuminates a smaller area and being able to move it easily means you can light up just the place you want and you're not limited to like 4 feet from an outlet (which 99% of people weren't responsible for installing and therefore aren't actually liable for 'planning badly')

-8

u/Sacharon123 12h ago

...why are you so obsessed with moving your lamps around all the time?! Can you not afford some nicely placed actually BRIGHT lamps that illuminate the room sufficiently And the 99% of the people are still responsible for planning their room...

13

u/TraditionalGap1 11h ago

I don't want bright lamps. I have a perfectly good table lamp on the nightstand and I rarely turn it on. It's not a matter of 'afford' it's a matter of preference and convenience.

-6

u/Sacharon123 11h ago

So why does that need to be on a battery if its on your nightstand?

10

u/TraditionalGap1 11h ago

It doesn't need a battery. It's a typical table lamp, with a cord. The portable one that I actually use regularly moves around, and thus needs a battery.

-4

u/Sacharon123 11h ago

Again... why? Why do you need a bad moving light when you could have a bright fixed light? Does it need to be sometimes quickly cozy in front of the dishwasher or the footstool?

→ More replies (0)

1

u/BearWithHat 9h ago

Question is why are you acting so hostile?

1

u/Fauked 9h ago

They can't handle being wrong about anything. Many such cases

1

u/LordAgamotto 11h ago

I have several for my porch at night

-3

u/FordMaleEscort 12h ago

Yeah hotels should just give you flashlights instead of lamps

1

u/Educational-Wing2042 12h ago

What does a hotel have to do with anything

0

u/LuxuryBeast 10h ago

I prefer oil lamps.

5

u/BearWithHat 9h ago

I have one similar. You can leave it plugged in but it also has a battery. Great when the power goes out.

6

u/The_Tooter_Snooter 9h ago

My wife wanted to get chargeable sconces so we didn’t have to drill any holes lol 

I shut that down pretty quick 

277

u/Hottage Chronically Online Turbo Nerd 15h ago

4

u/brianMMMMM 12h ago

Those hands tell a story. A story of greatness.

50

u/andersTheNinja 15h ago

But it is how you turn it off

1

u/Natural_Branch_9303 11h ago

Underrated comment lol

75

u/Fit_Cucumber_709 15h ago

Are you the person stabbing the touchscreen built into my airline seat back?

10

u/SteroidMaximus 12h ago

One time a lent my phone to an old woman stranded at the train station to call her ride and she was making the LCD bleed she was pushing it so hard to dial

5

u/Scarecr0p 11h ago

The urge to see if I can push my screen that hard is almost overwhelming.

23

u/LucyLilium92 13h ago

To be fair, those screens are usually so old and desensitized that you need to press firmly in some areas to make it work

15

u/AppropriatePlum1006 11h ago

It's possibly a proximity sensor that detects your hand?

3

u/wivaca2 10h ago edited 10h ago

You know, back in the 70s we could turn on lights by clapping our hands so we didn't need to go near the lamp.

It had this ingenious indicator that the lamp was on - the lamp went on.

Of course, it didn't work well for Dumbledor, which is why he made the Light Catcher. I guess tenebrosity really is the mother of illumination.

2

u/MindlessMage777 8h ago

Well we have something much better now! You can link your lights to Alexa and use voice commands to try and convince it to turn them on while it says it doesn't understand!

2

u/Used-Salad-3772 7h ago

CLAP ON CLAP OFF

1

u/AppropriatePlum1006 8h ago

Probably a bad idea for every couple. 😂

45

u/lateplayerr 15h ago

Touch screens hate to see you coming

12

u/0_cunning_plan 8h ago

I see a power symbol (IEC 60417-5009 stand-by symbol, IEEE 1621 power symbol), I press it.

39

u/Captain-Codfish Hillary 2016 15h ago

8

u/le_nathanlol 14h ago

how does that shit loop so perfectly

0

u/Captain-Codfish Hillary 2016 14h ago

It's a gif

4

u/le_nathanlol 14h ago

jif

8

u/ChuddyMcChud 13h ago

Jraphics Interchange Format.

3

u/le_nathanlol 12h ago edited 5h ago

jurassic world o algo im not into this informatics shit

1

u/MircowaveGoMMM 3h ago

Gurassic world

3

u/NarrMaster 13h ago

Joint Potographic Experts Group

8

u/Busy-Inflation6972 5h ago

I'm guessing you really pressed hard instead of a tap. It managed to make it through all other guests who used it before you.

24

u/TheDogeLord_234 14h ago

Why take a picture of the lamp before ?Did you break it for views?

51

u/SpecialChain7426 14h ago

Good thinking. There’s a second one on the other side of the bed

22

u/Just_passing-55 14h ago

You probably should test the second one as well.

10

u/Valuable-Locksmith21 14h ago

Give it a good smack right on the power button

12

u/TheDogeLord_234 14h ago

I applaud your appreciation of my criticism of if you were being deceptive

5

u/SpecialChain7426 11h ago

Thank you for the applause :)

18

u/SGTRoadkill1919 13h ago

A small question. Did you press it like a reasonable person would with a reasonable amount of force, or did you smash it like you were playing a carnival game

6

u/unicornsandrainbowst 8h ago

100% smashed. I have the same lamp. Yes, is not bulletproof plastic, but i would need to actually want to break it to put enough force on my finger to break it. Its a "tap" thing, you only need to tap it, but pressing like a normal human being doesn't break it

10

u/Ozzie-Isaac 13h ago edited 13h ago

im dying just picturing OP steadily increasing pressure to turn this on, "any second now, ah i've seem to have gone right through"

4

u/skyesherwood32 14h ago

how do you actually turn it on?

10

u/Jacob520Lep 14h ago

Touching it gently. It has to be charged first though.

4

u/ReturnOfBane 8h ago

lol it must be one of those capacitive touch lamps

3

u/Magic_mousie 16h ago

Nope. I am not okay.

8

u/Moron_Noxa 15h ago

why did you punch it

2

u/demoman_fromtf2 9h ago

Funniest swipe in my life

5

u/Denariox 16h ago

Dayum bro are you Bruce lee? How strong is your finger? Or that top part was just very weak?

2

u/BreathAggravating967 14h ago

Instructions unclear, impaled lamp

2

u/Round-Cow-2306 16h ago

even the hulk wouldn't break that if he tapped it

1

u/satirecringeXT 15h ago

bruh why tf did you use L forwards + triangle on beowulf on it?

1

u/AppUnwrapper1 14h ago

I laughed at the second photo. Sorry.

1

u/Valuable-Locksmith21 14h ago

How does it turn on?!

7

u/seeker_moc 14h ago

It's a touch sensitive button. You just tap it with your finger instead of whatever OP did.

1

u/Gingerbread__08 13h ago

I did not expect the 2nd photo lol

1

u/wivaca2 10h ago

I see, so the universal on/off button symbol lights up when the light comes on so that you know it's on. But how do I turn it off then, and if I do, how do I know it's off if I can still see the symbol? Maybe it's just dim?

1

u/shikkonin 10h ago

Of course it is. There's just no need to press down on it like you're trying to squeeze water out of sandstone...

1

u/MercuryMMI 9h ago

The good news is you can still turn the lamp on and off by tickling the spring under where the "button" used to be

1

u/Stuspawton 9h ago

You’re not supposed to break it…

1

u/FormalWare 8h ago

Eureka! The perfect post!

I am perfectly, yet mildly, infuriated.

0

u/Mcnubsauce 16h ago

This is more than just Mildly imo

0

u/-Laffi- 14h ago

It was a nice lamp. WAS!

-6

u/Benwa_Ballz 12h ago

What made you think that’s a button that pushes in?

14

u/FordMaleEscort 12h ago

Probably the fact that it's shaped and labeled like a button that pushes in

0

u/Particular-Poem-7085 15h ago

Bro how hard is this button to push

0

u/SpecialChain7426 10h ago

Guys where can I convert karma to money i’m trynna pay the landlord for the broken lamp