College roommate borrowed my toothpaste and this is how he returned it

[u/Live_Boat17]

The color of my toothpaste is purple and apparently he had his old toothpaste on his brush before he used mine.

EDIT: It's not shit. His old toothpaste was brown.

Still mildly infuriating...

[u/TheRealPaj]

Why is it brown?

WHY IS IT BROWN!?!?

[u/J-Cock → u/TheRealPaj]

He put it in his butthole, duh!

[u/Notyerbusiness → u/J-Cock]

[u/Wakkit1988 → u/Notyerbusiness]

[u/8JHF8 → u/Wakkit1988]

[u/woundedSM5987 → u/Wakkit1988]

I cackled this is gold.

[u/Harry431 → u/Notyerbusiness]

I love this EMT.

[u/catupthetree23 → u/Harry431]

Badge502!

[u/One_Olive_8933 → u/J-Cock]

https://giphy.com/gifs/08y87EiwDZjjB0d6WJ

[u/WInativemm → u/One_Olive_8933]

https://giphy.com/gifs/KxgQgAUQSthEk

[u/iamphr0glov3r → u/WInativemm]

[u/weefees → u/iamphr0glov3r]

lol his face

[u/Dirt-Road_Pirate → u/WInativemm]

https://giphy.com/gifs/13EUIwdK9g17cA

[u/Glitter1237 → u/WInativemm]

This one got me lol

[u/Financial-Corgi-1897 → u/One_Olive_8933]

🥳🥳🥳Obviously, he was sticking the tube up his asshole to clean it.

[u/BurgerThyme → u/Financial-Corgi-1897]

He wasn't even trying to clean his asshole, he wanted minty tingles while he jacked it.

[u/violetmartha47 → u/Financial-Corgi-1897]

Maybe he used his ring to get the lid off because it was tight.....the lid 😂

[u/1PooNGooN3 → u/J-Cock]

Minty fresh

[u/TheOnlyKirby90210 → u/J-Cock]

XD you wasn't supposed to say it. Trauma!

[u/BigBitcoinBaller → u/TheRealPaj]

Not WHY.. but HOW is it brown?????? Tooth paste can go what seems like decades without changing colour. Why now does it go brown!?!? Like what fckn science experiment did they do to make it brown?!

[u/TheRealPaj → u/BigBitcoinBaller]

I... I don't think the brown is toothpaste...

[u/YouToot → u/TheRealPaj]

It is shit, Austin.

[u/Smagjus → u/BigBitcoinBaller]

There was a guy I knew who spit out brown toothpaste. It was due to blood from his inflamed gums...

[u/Famous_Shallot_1812 → u/TheRealPaj]

[u/NoFun3799 → u/Famous_Shallot_1812]

Where is this from??? 😅😝

[u/EggsceIlent → u/TheRealPaj]

Yeah the roommate would get that back to keep as well as a request for a replacement new box of toothpaste.

Disgusting.

[u/TheOnlyKirby90210 → u/TheRealPaj]

You know why. *blinks back the tears*

[u/TheRealPaj → u/TheOnlyKirby90210]

https://giphy.com/gifs/BIN2S0sgQwdeE

[u/TheOnlyKirby90210 → u/TheRealPaj]

Shhh it's ok, internet friend. It'll be ok.

[u/laazofiina → u/TheOnlyKirby90210]

Some questions are better left unanswered for your own sanity

[u/sowhat4 → u/TheRealPaj]

He mistook it for hemorrhoid cream? 🤢

[u/Grouchy_Ground_1916 → u/sowhat4]

Years ago, my lady friend started hand stuff with a healthy dollop of deep-heat rub. Thanks for the flashback.

[u/TheRealPaj → u/Grouchy_Ground_1916]

https://giphy.com/gifs/kQelK8EjZWaRPQq2D7

[u/AccomplishedMode4846 → u/Grouchy_Ground_1916]

Ouch lol

[u/BlackdogA → u/sowhat4]

https://giphy.com/gifs/KRxcgvd5fLiWk

[u/MasterWinstonWolf → u/TheRealPaj]

Cleaning his rectum🤷‍♂️

[u/Aliens_n_Atheists → u/TheRealPaj]

Why is it purple?? What are y’all using?? Poo pudding and toilet bleach?

[u/TheRealPaj → u/Aliens_n_Atheists]

I actually have purple toothpaste... It's a whitening one... But the one in the pic is blue.

[u/Comprehensive-You705 → u/TheRealPaj]

Righty tighty lefty loosey

[u/ExmoRunner]

Did he take it camping and drop it in the dirt? That's my most wholesome and optimistic thought

[u/cremaster2 → u/ExmoRunner]

Maybe put wrong cap on the first time? What it contained stuck to it

[u/account312 → u/cremaster2]

Yeah, I'm always getting my toothpaste cap and my shitbox cap confused.

[u/badcrass → u/account312]

Makeup foundation? Being optimistic here

[u/violetmartha47 → u/cremaster2]

Yes, like they accidentally put the pootube cap on it. 😆

[u/rossmcdapc → u/ExmoRunner]

Probably going to be more holesome than wholesome

[u/Reasonable_Tip3132 → u/ExmoRunner]

" Bro can i borrow your toothpaste " takes it on a camping trip

[u/MoofDeMoose]

Is he aware that it’s really only used for “teeth” and not… other parts of the body?

[u/Sorry_Koala_8181 → u/MoofDeMoose]

nah it doesnt make sense. If you atuck it in your butt you would keep the cap on. Sth weirder is afoot here

[u/cheriecheesecake → u/Sorry_Koala_8181]

Not unless you're wanting to feel that minty fresh feeling all up in your butthole

[u/mongojob → u/cheriecheesecake]

What's the point otherwise

[u/hobosbindle → u/MoofDeMoose]

“For external use only”

[u/SmellBumWee]

I'd smell that before I do anything. Looks suspiciously not like toothpaste

[u/evil666overlord → u/SmellBumWee]

Nope. Straight in the bin. Next tube gets well hidden. Roommate cannot be trusted with anything in future.

Username checks out though.

[u/Nefriti → u/evil666overlord]

no. straight to the roommate with questions as to why in the fuck it’s covered in mystery shit, then bin. then roommate buys more toothpaste.

[u/Kaiju_Kitty → u/Nefriti]

Then a new roommate. 🤣

[u/Leading-Chemist8173 → u/Kaiju_Kitty]

Bin the roommate

[u/DingoPoutine → u/evil666overlord]

No this is now the decoy toothpaste. The real toothpaste must never be spoken of or acknowledged in that home.

[u/mtndewfeind → u/DingoPoutine]

This is the way

[u/BootFun6020 → u/SmellBumWee]

Hell no, not smelling anything toss it and buy another not worth the biohazard.

[u/fallen_d3mon → u/SmellBumWee]

https://giphy.com/gifs/l0HUg6Ypas42ubkXu

[u/theraf8100 → u/SmellBumWee]

I.... would not smell that.

[u/strangeflappenings]

This is from his old toothpaste? Thats extremely gross that he doesn't rinse his brush EVER and the resulting sludge wipes off onto your cap. Throw it out, and lesson learned. Don't let him borrow anything EVER lol

[u/TheVermonster → u/strangeflappenings]

Nah, keep it for the next time he needs to borrow the tooth paste.

[u/OrpKerwor → u/TheVermonster]

And you can keep THAT, thank you…

[u/Real-Creme-3482 → u/TheVermonster]

And then he’ll post it here and say “borrowed my roommate’s toothpaste and this is what it lookslike”

[u/sLeeeeTo → u/strangeflappenings]

right? do not use this biological weapon he has returned to you, OP

[u/WoofusTheDog → u/strangeflappenings]

Maybe he put the cap from his old toothpaste on this one, and it transferred that way. It’s the only explanation that isn’t disgusting.

[u/SheQuick26 → u/strangeflappenings]

I still don’t understand how it would result to brown crud around the inner threads. How tf are they using tooth paste?? Why would it be in there?

[u/Coloradokush5280]

https://giphy.com/gifs/BO6i071r5OZLjYiGQL

[u/Calm-Butterscotch961 → u/Coloradokush5280]

😂😂😂 Immediately 😂😂😂😂

[u/Pretty_Market_2219 → u/Coloradokush5280]

This is the only appropriate response.

[u/1awesomethr0away → u/Coloradokush5280]

I don’t care what explanation people come up with, this is the only answer that makes me feel better about what I just saw.

[u/gaycyclops]

OK, I really hope it’s not shit. I would just like to know is your roommate a woman or do they wear makeup because I’m thinking maybe they accidentally tried to screw on the lid to their foundation or concealer to the toothpaste by mistake because they were just sitting on the counter and they were a mess and then they didn’t bother to clean it, which is equally as shitty, but at least it wouldn’t be poop. Regardless, they should buy you toothpaste.

[u/No-Gas5342 → u/gaycyclops]

That’s what I was thinking. It’s got to be it right? There’s no way this happens casually otherwise right????

[u/Sipikay]

What would his old toothpaste color have anything to do with there being brown shit all around the top of your toothpaste?

Do people keep their old toothpaste on their toothbrush after they’re done brushing their teeth?

And then, before their next teeth brushing, they rub that old toothpaste all around the top of the toothpaste bottle?

Is that the implication?

[u/coleyeliz → u/Sipikay]

Fr I've never seen brown toothpaste

[u/Bitter-Marsupial → u/coleyeliz]

It's ad caused quite a bit of controversey

[u/Aware_Box8883 → u/Sipikay]

My own brush never comes in contact with my own toothpaste nozzle, let alone someone else's toothpaste nozzle.

[u/OperationMapleSyrup → u/Aware_Box8883]

There was a post on here where a girl was upset bc she forgot her toothbrush and went to use her boyfriend’s toothbrush and it was all shredded like he chews it or something. Barely any comments were addressing the fact that she was willing / planning to use another persons toothbrush. 🤢

[u/angie456 → u/OperationMapleSyrup]

I remember this and remember scrolling through the comments thinking I was crazy that no one else was freaking out about that

[u/personal_cheezits]

I’ve never seen brown toothpaste.

Straight to the garbage for that tube. 🤢

[u/koolaidismything → u/personal_cheezits]

I think he pasted his anus. There’s a sentence I never imagined seeing/typing.

[u/tryyeezus → u/koolaidismything]

You'll laugh until you try it for yourself

[u/Nazgog-Morgob → u/personal_cheezits]

My dog's tooth paste is brown. It's also peanut butter flavored

[u/Gh0st_Pirate_LeChuck → u/personal_cheezits]

https://giphy.com/gifs/wjuXuDSQU0sOfJIHS1

[u/icap_jcap_kcap → u/personal_cheezits]

Patanjali and dabur red toothpastes are brown

Op seems to be indian, and those are quite common here

[u/Frosty_Mongoose9055 → u/personal_cheezits]

I heard it turns that color when you stick it up your butt

[u/Elamaday → u/Frosty_Mongoose9055]

https://giphy.com/gifs/08y87EiwDZjjB0d6WJ

[u/tryyeezus → u/Elamaday]

He definitely already did

[u/heyitstism → u/personal_cheezits]

… and the roommate.

[u/LetshearitforNY → u/personal_cheezits]

STRAIGHT to the garbage (agree just emphasizing)

[u/SomeBlueDude12 → u/personal_cheezits]

Even after hearing his old paste was brown I cant help but to think he boofed OP's tooth paste tube

[u/Sharp-Tea4354]

That explanation still makes no sense. He had to have scrubbed his toothbrush all over that nozzle. Toss it 100%

[u/karuniyaw → u/Sharp-Tea4354]

This also doesn't make sense.

I washed my toothbrush after use until no toothpaste or anything else is left on the brush.

For that friend to scrub their toothbrush on the nozzle and left those questionable thing on it means their toothbrush is disgustingly dirty. Who brushes their teeth like that? Their hygiene habits should be debated.

[u/leverloosje → u/karuniyaw]

You wonder why he even needed toothpaste…

[u/LowReporter6213 → u/Sharp-Tea4354]

It still looks like they put it up their butt

[u/iamblankenstein]

A) he doesn't rinse his toothbrush after he's done brushing? B) he rubs the tube all over the brush to apply toothpaste?

never let this guy borrow anything ever again.

[u/--iCantThinkOFaName- → u/iamblankenstein]

I don't even wanna know what typa guy's toothbrush has so much debris [left] on before or after.

[u/SadBread8639 → u/--iCantThinkOFaName-]

Even if you don't rinse it, toothpaste gets dry and this couldn't happen. My best guess is that he's one of the people who use a humongous amount of toothpaste. Applied his own, it run out before achieving the desired amount, so he applied OP's on top of it and made a mess.

[u/LoganoXD → u/iamblankenstein]

Yeah I have no clue how that’s even possible. Even if he did need to touch the nozzle to the brush (he doesn’t) it would be the tip where the toothpaste comes out, no? Why would he need to put the bristles on the threads that the cap screws onto? It literally just doesn’t make sense

[u/morningisbad → u/iamblankenstein]

Right? Both of those things are gross... Also, if you clearly made a mess of someone else's stuff, how hard would it be to grab a piece of tp and clean it?

[u/LovelyLunaRae]

BROWN?? 😭

[u/wookiex84]

https://giphy.com/gifs/3o7TKybjJqve4XIdJm
Is your roommate Mr Hanky?

[u/flat_6astard]

ask them wtf? then toss it out

[u/phx34suns → u/flat_6astard]

Nah let them keep it see if they use it

[u/tquiring]

Dammit Jim, it’s toothpaste not hemorrhoid cream!!

[u/WhoSc3w3dDaP00ch → u/tquiring]

That would explain the increased burning sensation...

[u/Adventurous_Wave8339 → u/tquiring]

Boof paste.

[u/Nearby_Activity5071]

Just throw it away… go to dollar tree and buy some more ..$1.50
And by throw it away, I’m talking about your room mate

[u/Wickham12 → u/Nearby_Activity5071]

Nah, man. Gotta get that hydroxyapatite toothpaste. Costs more, but will definitely save $$$ on dental bills down the road. Of course, OP would probably have to lock that stuff away 😂

[u/Asleep_Current912]

“he had his old toothpaste on his brush before he used mine” I would love to see how he applies toothpaste.

[u/MasterPhilip → u/Asleep_Current912]

From the looks of it, he starts by inserting the open toothpaste tube into his rectum...

[u/Step-exile → u/Asleep_Current912]

Per rectum

[u/squeethesane]

"his old toothpaste was brown" ..... Okay, so what's the methodology for smearing the old toothpaste onto the new toothpaste tube... Because there shouldn't be enough old toothpaste on the brush and the brush shouldn't be contacting... You know what? That's his now. He owes you $5

[u/featherwolf → u/squeethesane]

That purple tube costs like 10 bucks

[u/Critical_Jicama_96 → u/squeethesane]

"there shouldn't be enough old toothpaste"........ THERE SHOULD BE NONE!!!

[u/Prestigious-Key-1886]

Get new toothpaste and maybe lock your stuff up

[u/GentlemanBAMF]

Do people not realize your toothpaste tube doesn't need to and shouldn't touch your brush? There should be no cross contamination. This is weird. And gross.

[u/ToldUtheyRComing → u/GentlemanBAMF]

This is the part that bothered me the most. This shouldn't even be a problem to begin with! 

[u/MonstrousGiggling]

It looks like he shoved it up his butt what the hell

[u/YellowGullible1857 → u/MonstrousGiggling]

Def stuck it up his butt 🤣🤣

[u/fallen_d3mon → u/YellowGullible1857]

https://giphy.com/gifs/fXJyMfUdqVCMPAnPJM

[u/txkwatch]

Now it's buttpaste

[u/revbfc]

Ask the RA about switching rooms.

This is just a preview of the hell you’re about to experience.

[u/ImaRaginCajun]

Did he put it up his ass?

[u/Rainor131 → u/ImaRaginCajun]

https://giphy.com/gifs/Vp1HduMcc8tTW

[u/Expert_Marsupial_235]

Don’t use it. Give it back to your roommate and tell him he owes you a new one.

[u/BootySherrif]

EVEN IF we suppose his old toothpaste "is brown," 😒 why is it all over the ring of YOUR toothpaste opening? What did he do? Does he not just squeeze a small amount onto the toothbrush? There's no need for the toothbrush or old toothpaste to touch another tube. Throw it away and get new toothpaste. I wouldn't trust that anymore.

[u/digidave1]

Boofpaste

[u/Notyerbusiness]

Grossss

https://giphy.com/gifs/baoZWeIWb7whsF82PP

[u/x_3mta3]

https://giphy.com/gifs/08y87EiwDZjjB0d6WJ

[u/Hollowbody57]

I'm stuck on the "he had his old toothpaste on his brush" bit.

Old toothpaste? Like, leftover toothpaste? You're not supposed to have leftover toothpaste on your brush!

[u/Excellent_Spite_7422]

Did he stick it in his ass? Soothing the old hemorrhoid with that soothing mint

[u/ViggoVognhjul]

Only share toothpaste with the people you kiss. 

[u/jeiwaruu]

Keep that one for when he needs to borrow it again but buy a new tube for yourself 😆

[u/AdnamannyL11]

Did he get confused and think it was this ?! 😳😳

[u/VideoLooksWeird]

What I find mildly infuriating about these posts is the lack of explanation or communication from the roommate. Them applying the toothpaste to their brush doesn't explain why it's brown. No toothpaste is brown.

So there was no follow up question to that? Just ok, walk away and post on Reddit, so hundreds of ppl can ask that one question OP didn't bother to ask. BUT WHY IS IT BRIWN THO? lol

[u/Estelita_777]

Save it for the next time he asks. And obviously get a new one for yourself.

[u/motherseffinjones]

I’d just throw it away and I’d keep my toothpaste and brush in my room from now on

[u/rupat3737]

Isn’t there a quote from the boondocks about borrowing toothpaste lol

[u/Consistent-Cost-9763]

Just what I need in my butthole, mint and grit.

[u/i_am_carver]

Nah dude. It’s going back to him and he’s getting told this is fucking gross and he needs to buy a new one and he’s never getting anything borrowed his way again.

[u/TheMysticPhoto]

Hell no that was in his ass brody. Drop that in a bin and head to Walgreens that is human dookie.

https://giphy.com/gifs/6sBRRA4Y7yeVq

[u/Mrs-Francine-Smith]

https://giphy.com/gifs/pfaUCuYc0tbNpvTgn6

[u/chloe38]

What kind of toothpaste is brown? Eww

[u/adingoatemahbaby]

Either OP gave himself a toothpaste enema or his roommate brushes his teeth with poop from a butt💩

[u/EtherealHeart5150]

Abort! Abort! Level 5 biohazard!

Seriously tho...about that roommate, dude.

[u/BeltreCompany]

Yeah, I wouldnt use that.

[u/Nefriti]

now you march right up to that boy and you ask him “hey what’s this all over my toothpaste cap?”

[u/Pisces93]

He put that in his ass 100%

[u/Ethossa79]

[u/Godess_Ilias]

did he brush his ass with it?

[u/Redstorm_Hunter]

100% spike this into the trash and never look back.

[u/viennese-wolf]

Did... did he stick it in his anus?

[u/ProtectionContent977]

Borrowed your toothpaste???

[u/HeyanKun]

Giving him the benefit of the doubt that he didn't shoved it into his ass,does brown toothpaste even exist?

[u/GuraSaannnnnn]

Don't use it! DON'T USE IT!!

[u/Rom_Tiddle]

The only color toothpaste I’ve seen be brown is for dogs…

[u/7053PH7]

his toothpaste brown? you sure he didnt shove it in his ass and gave it to you?

[u/Pro_Omoua]

Did he put that thang to his butt??? Spicy...

[u/calmfetish]

Did he shove it up his...? Nevermind

[u/Notfunliketheysaid]

https://giphy.com/gifs/29nDtEH1ViY8FcPeaV

[u/Late_Librarian_4077]

https://giphy.com/gifs/yIJrNGX9wF7eE

[u/zepol_xela]

https://giphy.com/gifs/ep78UZy5FVbfN6mhCU

[u/AMJET8]

He has teeth in his BH

[u/cainreliant]

the hell did he do, shove it up his ass? that's gonna go into the trash ASAP, I hope 😭

[u/Aggressive-Return769]

why did he put it in his ass 🥀

[u/Riyeko]

I know there's a joke that's randomly spread upon social circles on and off line.

But.... Did he actually stick it up his butt?

[u/Jurtaani]

Dude thought it's toot paste.

[u/girl_supersonicboy]

Throw that and the roommate out

https://giphy.com/gifs/QVP7DawXZitKYg3AX5

[u/jimbo2150]

“he had his old toothpaste on his brush before he used mine”

Wait, he doesn't rinse off his toothbrush?

https://giphy.com/gifs/AlEp8Fj45KPLO

[u/Escape_Force]

And now he has a minty fresh bunghole.

[u/setitforreddit]

Pooptaste

[u/Ill_Consequence1755]

Did he brush his ass with the open tube?

[u/Apprehensive-Stay196]

In all the years I’ve been buying toothpaste (I’m 49, so many years now) this has never happened to me. HOW does this even happen.

[u/AgelessEuphoria]

Looks like it's been sitting at the bottom of a makeup bag for 6 months

[u/BigManLikeBarey]

Did he put it up his arse

[u/SaltyYumYumBalls]

Pro-tip: The younger a roommate is male/female. The less time they've had to adapt to not being nasty/thief/asshole.

[u/BiggieCheddarCheez80]

No

[u/Damiru_Sanesu]

Are they a sea cucumber by any chance?

[u/Lost-Childhood-8301]

tf....did he shove it up his ass?

[u/Silver_Ambition_4924]

Noooope thats been inside them

[u/Adventurous-Poet9052]

https://giphy.com/gifs/13pqs1VizKyWzK

[u/RandoDando10]

Did he dip it in chunky peanut butter first?

[u/dizzydugout]

You know...it's a great day to go toothpaste shopping. One of the Great American Pastimes

[u/halfasrotten]

How long was it borrowed for?

[u/splshd275A]

https://giphy.com/gifs/cDkHKN3UGiuOs

[u/Frisk197]

How does that happened ?? The tube aged 10 years in a day ?

[u/Last-Celebration-941]

That toothpaste has probably been to places and seen things, no toothpaste should ever experience

[u/0575]

Somewhere in devianart there's a depiction of some japanese cartoon character doing what your buddy did to this tube.

[u/Anon_classybabe]

What tf did he do to it urggggghhh

[u/Local_Study_7135]

I’d definitely get a new toothpaste and maybe a new roommate.

[u/Stuspawton]

He definitely had that in his ass 😂

[u/DashPallvax]

You two have some beef or something because there is absolutely no way that’s “old toothpaste.” That definitely looks intentional with how engrained it is into all of the grooves of the cap.

[u/zwash3]

That is now HIS toothpaste

[u/I_-AM-ARNAV]

That's going into the trash

[u/isitallfromchina]

Poopaste!

[u/highwaypegasus]

This looks like concealer/foundation, if he took it over to a girl's place then he likely just accidentally put the wrong cap on.

[u/Lo_jak]

Thats been in someone's ass