r/SipsTea • u/velorae • Jul 22 '26

SMH Proof that all you need is money

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33.1k Upvotes

81% Upvoted

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26

u/Kah1eesi Jul 22 '26

Yes. That and "inner goddess"

57

u/SnooGuavas4208 Jul 22 '26

I never got over the part where he massaged her dOwN tHeRe with a soaped-up washcloth 😂

Nothing says kink like a burning urethra.

10

u/IlladelphiaticInsane Jul 22 '26

Christian, giddy with anticipation, then pulled out his most precious toy in all of the Red Room - the Foley catheter.

13

u/Wind-and-Waystones Jul 22 '26

Damn, I was hoping it was his lightning McQueen hot wheels

1

u/BSchafer Jul 23 '26 edited Jul 23 '26

He starts setting up hot wheel tracks, pushing the cars down the track into a loop and making car noises with his mouth while she strapped down in the background watching like… wtf

1

u/SnooGuavas4208 Jul 22 '26

I’m crying 😂😂😂

1

u/dishrag Jul 24 '26

Christian gazed deeply into my eyes, his strong hands moving lower, deliberately, sending a shiver down my spine. I braced myself for the passion, the intensity, the overwhelming sensation… and then he started me like a lawnmower.

5

u/boringestnickname Jul 22 '26

Wait, isn't the author a woman?

Is the point of the "scene" that she enjoys the pain of a soapy urethra, or is she just stupid?

4

u/TheSixthVisitor Jul 22 '26

Welp, I didn't expect this to be the sentence why I didn't do any work today but here we are.

1

u/sharanghayeo Jul 23 '26

I really hated the "inner goddess" references. I think at least once her inner goddess did a backflip too. The writing was sooo bad.