r/PoursTea • 🫖 Mod ☕️ • 3d ago

FeministTea👩🏻‍🎓👩🏿‍⚖️👠🥾 Be Better

558 Upvotes

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11

u/Mother_You_5739 3d ago

I find it interesting that as a man I am not offended by the points being made and don’t think I am being called a rapist or being accused of being a man who attacks women, but other men in the comments clearly are offended. If you are offended, why? If you understood how many women suffer unwanted attention and misogynistic abusive threats from men you might begin to understand why women are wary of you for no other reason than the fact you are a man they don’t know.

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u/Carbon_Sixx 3d ago

Drop an insult, and its owner will pick it up.

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u/MoiraRose_fan 3d ago

I love this; definitely borrowing it!

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u/F2d24 3d ago

Idk, i think im offended by it because my mom used to go "ehh, men" pretty often which doesnt feel great when youre a young guy growing up.

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u/Mother_You_5739 3d ago

Mums get a free pass criticising men. My mum loved me almost unconditionally, but she also had to put up with me! And my dad. And my two brothers! Not that my sister was perfect, but she didn’t do half of the crazy crap me and my brothers got up to.

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u/F2d24 3d ago

Absolutely not. Im sure my mother loves me but there where too many beatings and too much screaming to give a free pass for anything

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u/MoiraRose_fan 3d ago

Thank you for saying this. The great man I married is also not offended by these obvious points being made. Seems like the men being triggered here reallllly need to look inward.

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u/Mother_You_5739 3d ago

I hope my wife has a similar opinion of me as you have of your husband. I’ve done my best for 36 years this year, and don’t take her for granted.

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u/calycocalypso 3d ago

Narcissism. Being a victim hits dopamine centers of the brain & plays to narcissistic tendencies. Of course they insert themselves into the situation, theyre narcissists.

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u/[deleted] 3d ago

[deleted]

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u/Mother_You_5739 3d ago

Sorry, what? I don’t understand what you are trying to say.

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u/Joeybfast 3d ago

I am a person of color, When we stereotype everyone in a group in the same way, it can lead to dangerous outcomes. While some people have the collective power to remain unaffected, other groups of men are impacted by it.

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u/Mother_You_5739 3d ago

If a woman tells me she is wary of men and finds it hard to make friendships and trust men because of her experiences with men, I don’t feel like I am being stereotyped. The fact teachers have to explain to boys in PSHE lessons about the concept of consent in ridiculously simplistic ways to get them to understand no means no is reality, not stereotyping. If you as a person of colour had suspicions about me as a white person when we first met being a racist I wouldn’t feel stereotyped. I would be sad, but also understand the reality that the woman has had experiences that cause her to be wary just as I am 100% sure you have had experiences that make trusting white people something that has to be earned not just given.