r/NFLv2 • u/Bluefire3215 Philadelphia Eagles • 9h ago

Discussion I almost died today

A robber came into my house with a loaded gun and aimed at me

Luckily, the 2026 Eagles offense started playing on the TV.

He suddenly started watching and killed himself. Thank god 🙏❤️

371 Upvotes

93% Upvoted

33 comments sorted by

163

u/thepilot3 Philadelphia Eagles Denver Broncos 9h ago

I fucking hate this team

28

u/kanon951 Official r/NFLv2 Legend 9h ago

Would you say Jalen Hurts to watch?

56

u/NormJablonsky Philadelphia Eagles 9h ago

93 yards passing😂😂

Don’t have Patullo to blame anymore

12

u/DickBottalico Philadelphia Eagles 9h ago

Yeah we gonna egg Mannion’s house too?

Spoiled effing fans….this is how we ended up with Don Mattingly intentionally losing a playoff series so his son can tear down the baseball team

3

u/ItsBigNate Los Angeles Rams 9h ago

I wonder what the number is when you add in the sacks?

3

u/Thin_K New York Giants 7h ago

Might as well fire him again just to be sure.

1

u/9ontheTensionScale Detroit Lions 9h ago

Is Lemon ass? Kid's taking a while to get started.

7

u/NormJablonsky Philadelphia Eagles 9h ago

Lemon’s been fine, he just has a QB that doesn’t know how to run an NFL offense

5

u/Thin_K New York Giants 7h ago

He can't throw the ball to himself.

1

u/Particular-Ring5110 Philadelphia Eagles 9h ago

Honestly have no idea the offense doesn’t really function

I appreciate what Hurts has done with the Eagles but I can’t wait until he’s no longer the quarterback

1

u/addage- The standard is the standard 7h ago

I guess it wasn’t all AJBs fault.

1

u/aneomon New York Giants 5h ago

That’s who Jalen Hurts is lmao Chris Jones called it out a year or two ago and everyone clowned him, but he’s right.

16

u/C0llaps Buffalo Bills 9h ago

crazy how the robber actually was at my house first watching the bills play like retards. the gun wasn’t loaded before josh threw that int

1

u/Technical_Ant9051 Denver Broncos 7h ago

Came to my house next, then watched the utter demise of PS2.

10

u/A_New_Wave_ New England Patriots 9h ago

The robber shortly before loading the barrel:

https://giphy.com/gifs/KdhtWIJPPj74HynlHa

7

u/Legal_Fitness New York Giants 9h ago

Crazy how God works

1

u/worriedbowels Philadelphia Eagles 8h ago

Or, in your case, the Devil

6

u/mdez93 Philadelphia Eagles 8h ago

I’m down bad right now. This hurts more than the Bears loss. Eagles will most likely be in the playoff hunt all year because of the weak division, but they’re not winning anything. And now it feels like half the team is injured.

5

u/ImpossibleBoss3067 fuck the Cowboys 9h ago

Darius cooper deserves better

2

u/JazzFan1998 8h ago

All he does is catch touchdown passes!

3

u/ActivatedComplex 9h ago

I’ll allow it.

3

u/Few-Shoulder8960 9h ago

93 passing yards lmaooooo

2

u/pantyraider67 Baltimore Ravens 9h ago

the fucking bills blew my parley. Fuck Josh Allen and his DEI MVP

1

u/KGrizzle88 Chicago Bears 9h ago

Lmfao, I mean it should have been a blow out. Kept it interesting up until the end.

1

u/Ok_Cartographer2754 AFC 8h ago

I hope the police catch him and your home is safe from now on.

1

u/Whis65 8h ago

Getting silly in philly!

1

u/Jurgis-Rudkis Detroit Lions 8h ago

Bit of a stumble

1

u/Count_Dirac_EULA Detroit Lions 8h ago

Was the robber Sirianni by chance?

1

u/LamarJacksonsNutsack Choke Bird Ravens 7h ago

This belongs on r/NFCEastMemeWar. What a post lmao.

1

u/CanadianBallMapper Baltimore Ravens 4h ago

I love the eagles but I hate Hurts. He's just not it.

0

u/jesusmansuperpowers r/nfl sucks 9h ago

Soooo boring

0

u/peepdabidness Fred Warner’s loofa 8h ago

More like he realized he was in an Eagles’ fan’s house so he knew there would be nothing of value there and left