Regrets And Perspectives

[u/Timbucktwo1230]

[u/SoonerRed]

I gave up going into an internship and residency after vet school so my husband could go to law school.

As soon as i accepted a position, he told me he no longer wanted to go to law school

[u/Trustme_ima_doctor12 → u/SoonerRed]

Did you divorce him? Cause I would have

[u/SoonerRed → u/Trustme_ima_doctor12]

Yeppers

[u/Trustme_ima_doctor12 → u/SoonerRed]

Good for you!

[u/Zalophusdvm → u/SoonerRed]

Did you swap back to the residency path post divorce? Depending on your specialty of interest (and how long you stuck out the marriage) might not be (have been?) too late!

[u/SatisfactionFickle18 → u/SoonerRed]

So it really was all about you

[u/rebonkers → u/SatisfactionFickle18]

As it fucking should be. Good job Dr. SoonerRed!

[u/Dudewhocares3 → u/SatisfactionFickle18]

And what’s wrong with that?

[u/All_the_Bees → u/Trustme_ima_doctor12]

I would have poisoned his coffee.

Not really, but I would have daydreamed about it every day until the divorce was finalized.

[u/Tough_Pangolin_7471 → u/SoonerRed]

That's awful.

It reminds me of Betty Broderick. She was supporting the entire family herself while her husband went to med school. He got his MD then decided to go to law school.

[u/Senior_Violinist5296 → u/Tough_Pangolin_7471]

This was my ex husband.

When I got pregnant, I left college to move to his city so he could finish his degree (his parents supported us). When he finished his degree, I was supposed to get to finish mine, since he would be making money so we could afford childcare.

When he finished the first one (took him five more years!) he decided to go back for a few more classes so he could get a biology degree under his belt and do PA school.. okay, only three more years, right?

Took him two years to finish the bschelors of science add on. Then he missed the deadline to apply to PA school and decided on med school instead (another several years.. and still I stuck with this man!!). Then the next year he missed the application deadline AGAIN because he was typing his essay up in the window on the website at 11:45pm and an error happened and he lost it all.

Then I started planning to divorce him. I didn't make it happen until he'd started med school a couple years later and he was pissed about it, but I had waited so long to get to be someone besides a maid and a mom.

[u/ayeffston → u/SoonerRed]

Pardon me, I don't quite follow. So, you're saying you didn't become a vet, that you chose a position outside that field or an administrative position, instead of practicing veterinary medicine, which is what you wanted?

If that's the case, it sounds like your husband was threatened by your becoming a doctor, so he entertained the idea of law school with a subconscious motive of keeping you from proceeding with your goal. ("If my wife's gonna be a DVM, I'd better be something other than a shoe salesman")

I say "subconscious" because he could've have known that it would work.

[Typo: I meant he couldn't have known it would work]

[u/spacer9631 → u/SoonerRed]

I hope your quality of life is infinitely better than his.

[u/Time-Weekend-8611 → u/SoonerRed]

So what did he want instead?

[u/Dudewhocares3 → u/SoonerRed]

Why would he waste the opportunity you gave him?

Did he just expect you to deal with it?

[u/cougarsbite → u/SoonerRed]

I'd be like, "Umm...annnd...?" Yeah, marriage ain't for me...lol!

[u/WarningTight4843 → u/SoonerRed]

That's why you should live your life for yourself, other people. 

[u/Material-Command-854 → u/WarningTight4843]

Sacrifices can be pointless, yeah

[u/QQmorekid → u/SoonerRed]

So are you purposely leaving out details? Because whenever someone leaves it opens to interpretation they are usually full of shit